Feeling Stuck? Life isn’t turning out the way you imagined?
Feeling stuck is what you feel when you have a heart’s desire and you are not following your inner guidance. Everyone experiences being stuck at different times in life in work and relational areas most often. Some are content with the status quo and do not seem to mind being stuck while others are desperate to keep moving and not be stuck. What happens if you realize you are stuck? How do you free yourself from the mire and the potential heaviness of being stuck? Let’s talk about being stuck at work, you have an inner voice urging you one way yet you find yourself stuck in another type of job entirely.
You may be like Amanda. Amanda is working for a good company making good money. She has one big problem though. Amanda does not believe in the company’s mission. Amanda has become increasingly unsatisfied at work and now she is beginning to listen to her inner voice that has ideas. She hears from a trusted other: “You don’t have to live like this”. A trusted other is a person who is able to hold your confidence, is safe and able to listen and offer input without personal agenda or judgment. Amanda uses these 4 steps with support and guidance to begin her transition into living with more inner alignment.
There are 4 simple actions to get you going again.
Step 1: Be honest with yourself about the real issues surrounding your being stuck. Develop awareness. You may want to ask trusted others for their ideas. Have you been stuck for a short time or a longer time, say over 6 months? Ask yourself questions that lead you to understand what happened and how you created the stuck in your work life. If you are tempted to look at others, you are in the wrong neighborhood as your answer lies within. I taught Amanda these questions, try them for your situation.
- In what areas and ways do I feel stuck right now?
- What am I saying to myself to make being stuck Okay? Any excuses or blaming?
- What is my payoff for remaining stuck?
Step 2: Be open minded to receive feedback, support and encouragement from trusted others. Your stuck may have you feeling lonely so this step may be a bit challenging. When being stuck can feel lonely and isolated, reaching out and interacting with others with a solution focus can be difficult. Step 2 requires an open mind and a receptive heart. You will gain this the more inner honesty you have about the gravity of the consequences of remaining in a stuck and challenging place.
Einstein taught us that we cannot solve a problem with the same thinking that created it. After all, if you are stuck in an unsatisfactory work situation, keep in mind you will want to employ a new plan and action to move in another direction. If you always do what you always did, you will get the same results.
Amanda used these inner questions to prime the pump:
- Am I willing to write down all my ideas about my work, career and vocation?
- Who do I know including my mentor who can listen to me without judgement or attachment to my outcome?
- Am I open to listening to my heart and instincts to see where they are leading?
Notice you and Amanda do not actually have to act yet. This is the time to open your mind to your inner truth and see how it aligns with your life.
Step 3: Take Action that aligns with your heart’s vision and desire. After sharing with trusted others, take action related to what you discovered in step 2. This is not about trying as trying is a noisy way of doing nothing. Take at least one simple action that aligns with your vision. Then take a couple more actions that seemed to fit for you. This the beginning of the overall plan for moving forward.
It is important to note here that when you are stuck, taking action is the most powerful thing you can do. Overthinking and procrastinating will keep you stuck. Take an action, get feedback from you and others then take another action. Soon, you will have momentum and can better target your actions to meet your goals and visions.
Step 4: Note progress and get feedback. Feedback can come from you and it is even more powerful from a like-minded person who understands your goals and challenges. Feedback loops should be frequent initially. Daily at first is a good idea until you have momentum and can extend the time frames slowly.
Once you have some momentum, even the slightest amount, you are then able to take actions and make choices to keep yourself moving. Be sure to use your awareness of how you found yourself stuck as a barometer for future use. You might want to speak with a trusted confidante about ways you get stuck and what works to help keep you motivated. Giving them permission to say something to you if they see any old patterns emerging is helpful. Use their support. We do not live in a vacuum so remaining in contact with others is vital.
Once you are free of being stuck and you are moving again, take time each day to be sure you remain focused on your vision. Use methods that work for you to keep your vision alive.
Amanda followed these steps and she was successful is getting unstuck. She is now following her heart’s desire and calling. Her vision is clear and she shares that she is happier and calmer because she is using her inner compass to make her career decisions. You can make great progress in getting unstuck in your work by starting with these 4 steps and continuing to remain focused. That is one of my role for Amanda, as her mentor, I support, educate and inspire her to keep her vision alive and thriving.
Now, be honest with yourself and open your mind. The answers will come, I am certain.
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