Every person has a different perspective, story, and level of pain. It doesn’t matter because you deserve to find somebody who can help guide and support you in making the changes that you say you want to make.
If you’re struggling with something, know that you’re not alone. You’re not supposed to do it all by yourself. If you’re trying to help someone, it’s essential to understand how you can give them the kind of help they need. In this week’s episode, Dianne A Allen sheds some light that addiction isn’t what you think it is.
Part One of ‘Addiction Isn’t What You Think It Is’
We’re in a culture that sets a different definition for the term addiction, not realizing that everyone struggles. When people experience the kind of pain they’ve never felt before, there’s a roller coaster ride of chaotic emotions.
“Having a support group that is supportive of your process without their agenda getting in the way is extremely important.” – Dianne A. Allen
We are constantly presented with things that we believe will make us happy. There are many things that people do to cover up the hole inside of them, which eventually leads to addiction. Unfortunately, when they return to the real world, the problem is still there, still nagging at them. It could be an eating disorder, sex, drugs, alcohol, gambling and many more. The sad thing is, healing isn’t taking place because the inner wound isn’t getting the right support it deserves.
Some people are trying to help somebody who is suffering from addiction from a cognitive mental standpoint. They keep telling them to find a spiritual life without really showing them how to do it or teaching them. Or worse yet, they lack compassion for that person’s suffering.
It takes time to heal and there are many things to consider. Just because somebody might look calm doesn’t mean they’re not hurting. Just because somebody is smiling doesn’t mean that’s not a coping skill to help their pain.
Being able to listen genuinely is considered a great superpower. Isn’t it rewarding when someone tells you that you’re the only person who ever listened to their pains? There’s absolutely nothing wrong with telling yourself the truth about your life, your state of affairs, and where you want to go. Map the road out for those kinds of things. Find a trusted person to help you out.
Part Two of ‘Addiction Isn’t What You Think It Is’
Breathing is wonderful because when we pause a little bit, it resets our nervous system. It allows us permission to feel. Now, remember your feelings are the energy source that tells you you’re alive. You want to maintain feelings in our society. Many people don’t want to feel anything and then numb themselves out.
Pay attention to how you’re fueling your body. Take some time to breathe because if you’re not breathing correctly, your oxygen level gets depleted. Allow whatever pain is being held in the muscles and cells to emerge and come out like a bubble. In our culture, we learn if somebody hurts our feelings, the right answer is to let it go. Let things go in a way that works for you and serves you.
“Be someone who offers unconditional support with healthy boundaries.” – Dianne Allen
If anything goes wrong, it’s best to have a circle of friends or anyone you can call. You’re not supposed to deal with your pain alone. There’s a lot of unconscious resistance that we all have to change. Having a group that is supportive of your process without their agenda being in the way is extremely important. Without that, your awareness and real authentic support. It’s tricky to make long-term changes.
How To Connect With Dianne A. Allen
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