We ask ourselves and others questions all day. What do I want to wear today? What’s for dinner? Should I visit my friend in the hospital? How do I look? How are you? What do I really want to do with my life? What do I most value in my life? You get it, the list is endless. Questions are part of our everyday inner and outer dialogue. Even if you don’t think about the answer too long, the question remains. Positive statements or affirmations are good yet nothing can replace a powerful question. Often our action or inaction is all in the questions. Ask empowering questions and you create opportunities, ask dis-empowering questions and you create challenges and obstacles. You choose.
I learned many years ago that our brain answers all the questions that we ask, even if it has to lie. We are hardwired to ask and answer questions. Ineffective questions can lead to deceptive and disruptive answers. A smart child who gets frustrated while learning something new might ask “Why am I so stupid?” The brain must then make up a story to answer the question. This is how we are wired. In reality, the child is not stupid – simply frustrated. If allowed to continue this line of questioning, the child could develop an inaccurate belief system about their intelligence and value as a person.
There are many kinds of questions. Open ended and closed ended questions are mentioned frequently when discussing this topic. There are also assumptive questions and rhetorical questions. The most important questions, however, are the ones you ask yourself. Are your inner questions open and honest? These questions can help you stay focused or distract your path away from your vision and goals.
Here are seven important things to consider regarding your questions.
1. Do your inner questions empower you?
2. Are you open and honest with your inner questions?
3. Do these questions help you become clearer about your own values?
4. Are there any assumptions within your inner questions that may be out of date?
5. Are your questions clear and concise?
6. Do your inner questions guide you down a path of self-discovery?
7. Do your questions reflect what really matters to you?
Many people are not aware of the many questions they are thinking about on an ongoing basis. These questions form your life experience. Becoming increasingly aware of your questions will enable you to experience a rich, authentic life. Becoming aware of the questions is the first step. The more aware you are, the more options you will discover for your inner dialogue.
Effective questions show understanding. Asking effective, honest questions helps awaken you to your own inner truth and value. Your inner questions are rooted in what you really love; those things that keep you up at night and that you are passionate about in life. These deeper questions become your life. Asking ineffective or dis-empowering questions only yields disconnection form your inner truth. When you are disconnected inside, you are disconnected from your community or peer group. Any disconnection often leads to isolation. Using effective, honest questions leads you to a happier life in the flow and relieves isolation and disconnection.
It is vital to have a peer group that supports asking the deeper questions and will sit with you while you explore those deeper questions in an open and honest manner. As you explore your inner truth and are honest with yourself, your voice becomes aligned with your deeper core. This is the power of honest questions that become your effective tool for self-mastery.
Your inner questions are more important than statements or comments. Your questions lead your thinking toward or away from your inner truth. This is vital to understand. You are always asking questions. To be fulfilled and happy, ask better questions: the better the question the better your life. What sounds so simple is not necessarily easy. Pay attention to your inner dialogue and assess your questions. If they are not aligned with your highest good, consider changing your questions. The more diligent you are the better your results. How are you using questions for self-discovery and effective goal attainment?